Introduction
Literature is sometimes known as the mirror of life. Regardless of genre, stories that we read reflect on our own experiences and lives. With some, I can relate and make an emotional connection with the characters undergoing the same peaks and lows in life that I have. In contrast, others are foreign to me, presenting insights into new cultures, worldviews, and perspectives that I have never experienced. In this essay, I will explore how the literary works of A Good Man is Hard to Find and The Joy Luck Club helped me understand people that are much different while being the mirror in which I can reflect on my own life.
Different Lives
The short story A Good Man is Hard to Find portrays a caricature Southern family on a vacation road trip. It was tough for me to relate to this family, which is seemingly highly judgmental, hypocritical, and arguably perfidious. The grandmother, in particular, stands out as a deceitful and two-faced character, as she is racist, preposterous, and most importantly, self-righteous. She uses that to her advantage to manipulate the family and criticize them. I think that this Southern culture demonstrated here is highly matriarchal, which I have not had much experience with, given that my father was married four times. I can relate somewhat to the dysfunction in the family and the bickering, but the grandmother is tremendously toxic to her son-in-law and even her grandkids. She is egotistical and judgmental, which makes me think of the many people I encounter like that, who judge me for being a single mother or those who find out that I am part of the LGBTQ community. Being a non-traditional, mixed-race, single mother and a woman makes me a minority in many ways. However, living a life in the deep antebellum South, the grandmother would likely judge me for my lifestyle and choices. She holds herself as righteous, but in her eyes, I would likely not be a good person.
The major theme in the story is the elusiveness of defining a ‘good man’ and how grace through faith can come to anyone, even those who are not deserving. I am not much of a religious person, but I consider myself good as I try to do well by my son, those who surround me and be respectful and compassionate in society. However, in the story, the grandmother attempts to seem ‘good’ by dressing like a lady or associating with the right people, but it is evident that she is not good, as she is immoral and unkind. To her, those who are good do well by her and share her moral or world values. I cannot entirely agree with this as morality should not be defined by other people or circumstances; it is how one acts both in better times and in times of crisis.
Therefore, confident of her moral superiority and having no self-awareness, she remains critical and judgmental until nearly the moment of her death. Misfit notes, “’She would have been a good woman,’ The Misfit said, ‘if it had been somebody there to shoot her every minute of her life’” (O’Connor 13). Only in the moments before her death she attained some level of grace and understanding, different from her superficial religiosity and attitude earlier, and attempted to connect with Misfit on a fundamentally human level. I think it is both a matter of culture, time period, and upbringing. The grandmother was raised on a rich plantation, having all the comforts of life. Meanwhile, Misfit, had a mental illness, went through life with struggles. While being a murderer does not make him a good person, he at the very least understood humanity. I think those that experienced suffering in life, which I can associate with, are generally more aware of its realities, and such people treat others with a matter of mutual respect.
Seeing Myself
The Joy Luck Club tells an amazing story about immigration, addressing a whole range of concepts from the realities of the American dream to identity and parenting in other cultures. My father is of Mexican American origin, while my birth mother, whom I do not remember, was South Korean. My father’s next wife was Thai, and the one after that is Filipino, so I was exposed to a variety of different cultures growing up while struggling to find my own identity. I am a 2nd generation immigrant, and like the daughters of the Chinese mothers in the novel, it was always difficult for me to relate to my father and stepparents. I am essentially an American, despite my upbringing being different from a traditional US family. Culturally, I am aware of some of the beliefs and traditions, but I can connect on only a superficial level.
Identity was a factor that I struggled with for some time. Being LGBTQ, and mixed race, it was difficult for me to find myself among very conflicting social pressures. However, at one point late in high school, I began to recognize that I am unique, and that is something that I should be proud of. One of the character’s stories captures that well, “I…looked in the mirror… I was strong. I was pure. I had genuine thoughts inside that no one could see, that no one could ever take away from me” (Tan 48). The lesson from that story was that the balancing duty to one’s heritage and the duty to oneself is critical. It is important to respect one’s background and try to connect with it, but the new generations should not become passive, and there is no need to give up one’s own aspirations.
My relationship with my stepmothers was complicated, to the point of being abusive, while my father worked hard to provide a life for me. Trying to escape that, I made both good and bad significant decisions in my life, but that is what formed me as a person. Just as the character in the story, Lindo escaped passivity and the patriarchy that characterized many other females in the Chinese American culture. Even when I am labeled based on some characteristic or when my past attempts to take over my identity, I have the inner strength to know who I am and to stay the course of my life.
Conclusion
Both the stories examined in this paper describe the lives and attitudes of incredibly different characters. Some I could relate to, others not so much, but either way, they provided me insights and perceptions with which to look at the world and my life. Literature can be a powerful tool in exploring such a vast range of cultures, worldviews, and events, but it can truly serve as a mirror to reexamine and reaffirm what lies inside me.
Works Cited
O’Connor, Flannery. A Good Man Is Hard to Find. Faber & Faber, 2019.
Tan, Amy. The Joy Luck Club. Penguin Books, 2006.